We are always keen to gather interesting factoids about facial hair from our followers.  With beards having a huge resurgence, and Movember now a household name, we wondered whether its almost time for moustaches to move from 80s relic to a hero of the twenty tens.

W

e figured that in order for moustaches to grow in popularity they would first need to be associated with benefits that would make men want to have them.  This is why we expect that nose and ear hair will never become fashionable. There is nothing good about it.

To get the low down on perceptions, we ran a Facebook competition for the top reasons to grow a moustache.  The response was fantastic with thousands of people viewing, liking and contributing.  Once the R-rated comments were removed, we compiled a list of the most popular reasons for anyone needing encouragement to get bristles on their upper lip.  Here they are:
• To twist the edges as you tie a damsel in distress to the train tracks.
• Nature says you can.
• So you can eat your food twice.
• If you are a red head, your moustache & beard will
save you 50% in sunscreen.
• The added manliness keeps bears away.
• So you can challenge people to duals…..or rob
trains…..or just to generally be rad.
• So you no longer look like a baby.
• If there are peas in my soup, they don’t get past
the mo. I hate peas.
• To be mistaken as a 70’s porn star.
• Turns wine into fine wine with its filtration
capabilities.
• Because a moustache isn’t just a moustache – it’s
awesomeness escaping from your face.
• To look dignified, classy, accomplished and sleazy
all at the same time.
• To gain super powers.
• To look like a bad ass playing poker.

Apart from acting as a wine and soup filter, which is no doubt critically important, it seems the purported benefits of moustaches were almost unanimously dubious.  Surely one of the best things about moustaches was missed in the responses.  We think one of the biggest benefits is that moustaches can be a powerful signature for those that wear them. Could you imagine celebrities like Tom Selleck, Albert Einstein, Merv Hughes and Salvador Dali without a mo? Their moustaches became a huge part of their character and it helped to make them memorable.

Unfortunately, the competition didn’t help us to shed any light on whether moustaches are about to have a renaissance but it did suggest there’s no shortage of cheeky moustache innuendo out there. Clearly, regardless of where fashion trends are going to take us in the years ahead, “lip rugs” will always have their place either as the butt of jokes or as something eminently cool, depending on who you ask.  Not many body parts have that sort of distinction and that’s why we love them.  Long live the mo.

Dr Ben De Campo, Milkman Australia